DUMMIES
Dummies, like everything else baby-related it seems, are a great cause for controversy. The decision to use a dummy is entirely up to you as parents and each baby is different in terms of their settling skills and their preference to use a dummy or not. There is no "best" age to introduce a dummy; some babies have one from newborn, some when they're much older. Some babies have dummies for sleep only, some babies have a dummy to help calm them during the day.
Dummies can definitely be great in your baby sleep toolbox, but equally they can start to wreak havoc with your little one's sleep a bit later on. Here we'll explore these situations and provide you with a couple of solutions if you want to ditch the dummy.
WHEN THEY WORK:
The fact is, dummies are great settling tools for younger babies as sucking is extremely comforting. Babies younger than 3 months will resettle and move between sleep cycles a lot easier than older babies and won’t need the dummy replaced every time they come out of a sleep cycle. Meaning a dummy can be a great way to settle your baby to sleep at the start of each nap or overnight, without having a negative impact on their ability to stay asleep. For an overtired or overstimulated baby, a dummy can really help them calm and find their sleep - this is especially effective if combined with other settling tools such as a swaddle, white noise and a dark room.
Closer to 7 or 8 months your baby will be able to learn to put the dummy back in for themselves, a skill crucial to them being able to sleep through the night with a dummy. We REALLY recommend a product called a Sleepytot, which is a little comforter that has velcro paws you can attach dummies too, making it a lot easier for your baby to find and replace their own dummy in the night.
WHEN DUMMIES BECOME A NUISANCE:
Once your baby is closer to 4 months (and beyond) if they are using a dummy to go to sleep they might start needing it every time they wake between sleep cycles (45 minutes in the day and every 2 hours at night). This is a lot of dummy runs! Until your baby can replace their own dummy at around 7-8 months old, they will need YOU to replace it for them because they are relying on the dummy to fall asleep, so much so, that they are not able to go back to sleep without it.
If it becomes a problem, 3-4 months is a good age to ditch the dummy, unless you're happy to ride it out for a few more months until your baby can put it back in themselves.
What can also happen with using the dummy at night is that it can actually mask genuine hunger - the sucking can trick babies' brain into thinking they are being fed. This can, in itself, lead to more night waking because your baby is genuinely hungry, rather than just waking for the dummy.
Use of a dummy can also mean your baby is going to sleep during the day before they're properly ready for a nap. The sucking is such a strong sleep association it can mean your baby settles to sleep earlier than they would, which can cause them to nap poorly due to not being tired enough for a decent sleep.
HOW DO YOU GET RID OF THE DUMMY?
Firstly, you need to make sure your baby is in a good Sleeping and Feeding Patterns. This guarantees they are ready for their naps at the perfect times - a baby who is over or under tired will NOT be easy to wean off the dummy no matter what you do!
Next, ensure you’ve got other positive sleep associations in place to replace the dummy, such as a swaddle (or baby sleeping bag), white noise, a super dark room, a cuddly or comforter or even a Lulla doll. Use a Baby Shusher to help with settling.
There are two methods, depending on how quickly you want the dummy gone and the level of protesting you’re comfortable with:
QUICK METHOD: You will ditch the dummy cold turkey, starting with the first nap of the day and working through the other naps and bedtime that same day. You might need to help your baby settle for their naps by patting or shushing if they're upset while they get used to not having a dummy. This is known as protest crying (which any crying here will be - they are protesting the change, there is nothing actually “wrong” with them).
Each nap you put your baby down for, use the same method (patting or shushing if they're upset) and be consistent with your approach. Every nap they will take less and less time to settle. It will take about 3 days to break the habit (sometimes sooner!) if you’re consistent in your approach.
GENTLE/SLOWER METHOD: Here, you will replace the dummy with another settling tool/sleep association such as patting or side-settling. (See THIS video on how to side-settle a baby younger than 4 months.) You will begin by settling your baby fully to sleep using your chosen method WITH the dummy for 3 days. Do this even if they've previously been able to go to sleep without your help. Then, on day four, you will put your baby down for their naps and at bedtime WITHOUT the dummy and you will still settle them completely to sleep using your chosen settling method. In this way, you've created a new sleep association (you settling them) to replace the dummy. Once they are used to going to sleep without the dummy (but with you settling them), after around 2-3 days, you will then work on removing the settling, by only settling to calm them rather than to put them all the way to sleep. Once calm, you'd let them fall asleep by themselves.
For more detailed information about how to gradually reduce a settling sleep association (or if you have another sleep association like rocking or feeding to sleep you'd like to remove), the Little Ones Better Sleep Guides have several gentle methods to guide you through this process.
Once the dummy has gone, you can still use it as a RESETTLING tool, meaning if you need to resettle during a nap. At this age settling and resettling are totally different things to your baby.